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kateoplis:

"Everyone knows the only thing more awkward than searching for love IRL is trying to find it online. …
Luckily, WIRED has assembled a series of infographics explaining how to “optimize your online dating profile.” That’s tech for “get laid.” …
And now, the folks at Betabeat are telling you the most important points. These are actual real facts gleaned from hundreds of the most popular online dating profiles. Just to reiterate, we did not make these up. 
1. Men with tattoos are popular, while inked women are not. Better rethink that YOLO tramp stamp.
2. Don’t talk about karaoke. This is just a good general life rule.
3. Pretend you surf.
4. If you’re a girl, talk about London, NYC, yoga, surfing and “athlete.” And always refer to yourself as a girl, despite the fact that you have completed puberty and are well beyond first onset of menses.
5. If you’re a boy, use the words “surfing,” “surf,” “yoga,” “skiing” and “the ocean.” Basically, pretend you are a merman with a lift ticket. Never use the word “girl.” Steadfastly avoid females who refer to themselves as “women.”
6. If you’re a man, talk more about crafting and your children, and less about electronics. You’re Martha Stewart in a pair of Dockers.
7. If you’re a woman, talk more about electronics and don’t bring up crafting. Never, ever mention your children.
…
10. Talk about “cats” in general, just don’t say “my cats,” because that makes you sound like a lonely freak.
…
16. Men who use “whom” get 31 percent more contacts from women. It doesn’t even have to be grammatically correct. Whom knew!
17. Early Sunday afternoon is Grindr’s peak time, while it’s best to use Tinder, Match and OkCupid from 5 to 10 p.m. on the Lord’s Day. We’re sure this is either because boozy brunch gives people balls, or attending church strikes the fear of god in them that they might die alone.”
Online Dating is A Nightmare

kateoplis:

"Everyone knows the only thing more awkward than searching for love IRL is trying to find it online. …

Luckily, WIRED has assembled a series of infographics explaining how to “optimize your online dating profile.” That’s tech for “get laid.” …

And now, the folks at Betabeat are telling you the most important points. These are actual real facts gleaned from hundreds of the most popular online dating profiles. Just to reiterate, we did not make these up. 

1. Men with tattoos are popular, while inked women are not. Better rethink that YOLO tramp stamp.

2. Don’t talk about karaoke. This is just a good general life rule.

3. Pretend you surf.

4. If you’re a girl, talk about London, NYC, yoga, surfing and “athlete.” And always refer to yourself as a girl, despite the fact that you have completed puberty and are well beyond first onset of menses.

5. If you’re a boy, use the words “surfing,” “surf,” “yoga,” “skiing” and “the ocean.” Basically, pretend you are a merman with a lift ticket. Never use the word “girl.” Steadfastly avoid females who refer to themselves as “women.”

6. If you’re a man, talk more about crafting and your children, and less about electronics. You’re Martha Stewart in a pair of Dockers.

7. If you’re a woman, talk more about electronics and don’t bring up crafting. Never, ever mention your children.

10. Talk about “cats” in general, just don’t say “my cats,” because that makes you sound like a lonely freak.

16. Men who use “whom” get 31 percent more contacts from women. It doesn’t even have to be grammatically correct. Whom knew!

17. Early Sunday afternoon is Grindr’s peak time, while it’s best to use Tinder, Match and OkCupid from 5 to 10 p.m. on the Lord’s Day. We’re sure this is either because boozy brunch gives people balls, or attending church strikes the fear of god in them that they might die alone.”

Online Dating is A Nightmare